Deeper into the darkness
He’s a paedophile.
There: I’ve said it.
It’s the secret at the heart of Nick’s existence and it’s the nexus of the story.
We tend to think of paedophiles as ruthless or furtive predators. They pose as benevolent well-wishers whilst plotting evil against the loveliest and most vulnerable. By presuming to present Nick as a human being, I’m seeking to challenge that thinking whilst in no way condoning or excusing his tendencies.
The genesis for this story was a radio interview that I heard some years back in which a nineteen year old boy (and I have to call him a boy) was speaking about how he came to realise that he was attracted to children. It was a horror to him and was handled badly by those around him, but one thing was plain: he neither wanted nor embraced it, nor did he have any agency or volition in its arrival at his door.
This brings many assumptions about sexual preference and orientation into question, as well as challenging our simplistic attitudes towards individuals who are generally seen merely as pariahs.
These attitudes are natural. Nothing cleanses the village’s psyche like a good lynching, but it’s time we started to see the man trapped within the monster rather than making it easy on ourselves by reducing him to nothing more.
I am not pushing a line here. I have no dog in the race but I am interested in nuanced responses to complex problems simply because simple ones won’t work.
Nick’s issues have a bearing on almost everything that happens in the story. They are the ‘dark matter’ that exerts a gravitational pull on the events and characters whilst remaining hidden from view. Was the tragedy inevitable? Could the outcome have been different? The answers to these questions may be crucial in averting the real life tragedies that are evolving in our own homes and communities.
It’s not all about Nick. One of my early readers was much more engaged with Jess as a character and has suggested that I rewrite the second act, slipping Nick into the background as a mere adjunct to her story. I get that. I like Jess. There’s a kind of life-force in her that is constantly pulling away from the death that lurks within Nick’s personality. She has her own issues and her own set of choices and perhaps her responses are more interesting than Nick’s.
For all the burning issues and the grim subject matter, it is, apparently, an enjoyable read. I try to write ‘down-hill’ and, so far, those who have read it have found it compelling. This gives me hope both for the success of the book and for the possibility of engendering some thought and debate around the thorny issues as the heart of it